New York Yoga Journal Conference

Back in early April, I was asked to be a presenter at the Yoga Journal Conference in NY, and I thought it was a joke.  The person that had contacted me, I had never heard of before. And yet, somehow, he heard of me.  After verifying that this was in fact legit, I quickly accepted the request.  About ten minutes after I said yes, panic set in.
Speaking in front of people has never been my strongest point, although it seems like I do this every day when I teach a class.  In classic Stephanie style, I waited until the week before to put together the presentation and hoped for the best. Luckily I had help from loved ones and my assistant Jill.
The night before the conference was the most stressful.  I couldn't sleep, I couldn't relax, the only thing I did do was toss and turn and check the time every 10 minutes.
We arrived at the conference a half hour early, just enough time to get set up.  I had 66 people registered for my presentation and more than 100 showed up.  I was surprisingly cool, calm and appeared collected.
It seemed that the presentation went off without a hitch and I was finally able to relax and enjoy the rest of the conference, and it was at this moment that I again realized why I changed my life to be in this business. After the presentation, I had a line of people waiting to speak with me, asking me questions and seeing if I was for hire. I was shocked, overwhelmed and pretty much numb.  We collected our things and continued throughout the day, enjoying the rest of the conference.

As Jill and I moved in and out of the different yoga classes, moving out bodies to the rhythm of the different musical selections the instructors had and to the rhythm of our own breath, my body filled with joy and bliss.  During on of the classes we had taken, I found myself reduced to tears, and left trying to understand where that sorrow came from.  I quickly realized that it wasn't sorrow I was feeling.. it was elation.
I will admit that I haven't been a very good "yoga practitioner" lately.  I have moved away, far away from my own yoga practice and just focused on my teaching and others. But, not only had I moved away from my practice, I have moved away from myself, my breath and my ability to feel.
So this sorrow that I thought I was feeling, was not sorrow at all.  I was actually able to FEEL again, and for this all the anxiety, the stress and the sleepless nights I endured up until my part of the conference was over, was worth it.
I have reconnected to myself again, I have found my breath again and I can see all the good that is in my life and for that, I am grateful..

Personal Goals

As I was sitting at my desk at Crunch Gym this morning, I was flipping through a fitness magazine, and came across an article about a women who purchased a treadmill for her house, and fell into the trap we all fall into, never used it.  So she put a personal challenge in for herself to run 1,000 miles in one year, which ended up being 2.7 miles each day.  She blogged her progress and was accountable to everyone.. talk about support system!

These days with life flying by and everyone seems to busy even to make a few phone calls to loved ones, I think its important to have a support system.  People you can rely on to help you through the hard times, people who wont be afraid to get on you if your falling through the cracks.  Do you have people like that in your life?
Luckily I do, and they often go as untapped resources of encouragement, motivation and love.  Its time for me to put some personal fitness goals into place for myself now as well.. and I think that we all should do that.  Breathe Yoga is going to be presenting a program for you to develop your own fitness goals.. and how we can be of assistance to achieve those goals.  In the meantime, I am going to be developing my own goals.. stay tuned.. I will be blogging about them every day, and I hope you all hold me accountable to them, because I definetly need the encouragement!

Day #1- OK Shoulders.. I get it

Day #1 of full Budokon Training was.... truly amazing... 22 of us gathered onto a dock of The Standard Hotel, for a meet and greet with the MMA Students of the Budokon Academy and the Budokon Yoga Academy.  The morning was overcast and cool.. the water was calm, the people were welcoming and treated me like family.  Weirdly enough I am the only one from New York!  Kancho Cameron Shayne gave a speech that was absolutely amazing about being part of this Budokon Family, and how we were all hand picked.. for the qualities we posses and the qualities we didn't know we have yet. His philosophies on Yoga and Budokon are not the traditional thoughts.. and I really resonate with them.. I will discuss those later when my thoughts are fully formed.
After the pep talk the groups broke up into Yogi's and MMA trainers.  We went through each step of the Yoga Kata.. for 6 hours!  It was absolutely and utterly HARD!.. However, my spine feels open and mobile, my core was engaged and powerful, my breath was steady... and then my shoulders started to speak... more specifically my serratus and biceps tendon became VERY ANGRY..
Now.. I have always had issues with the right side of my body, due to the lovely scoliosis that I work with.. however, today, my left side was becoming annoyed.  I made it all the way to the last hour of training, when I decided I was going to try the Flow just one more time. and RRIIPPPP.. my left shoulder pulled away from my the shoulder socket... I immediately took the weight off the shoulder and eased my shoulder back into the socket.... can we say OUCH?!?!?!..
What the heck just happened? Did I tear something? Did I dislocate my shoulder? Can i move my arm... can I EVEN BREATHE??  The only thought that ran through my head was "Holy Shit.. I don't have health insurance!"

After icing down my shoulder and upper back, getting feeling back into my left hand... and i finally exhaled.. i tested the rotation of my arm, and WHAALAA.. It works!  Apparently I just seriously pulled the shoulder  girdle. Yet another lesson learned about listening to my body...

The unfortunate part of all this was I missed the testing out portion of the day.. the FORTUNATE part is that Kancho saw my training all day and passed me through to phase II.

Tomorrow is all about rolling .. which I LOVE.. and has NOTHING to do with my arms or shoulder.. WHEW!

Stay tuned!

Welcome Back..My Ego

Got on a plane this morning headed to Florida to start on my adventure of Budokon Teacher Training.  Its been years since I was on a plane.. and anxiety set in 10 seconds after we took off.. all mind of matter, and i settled myself down.  I forgot how much I love Jet Blue.. such a great airline.
Upon arriving in Florida, I hopped on a shuttle and headed to Miami Beach, to stay at the residence of Kancho Cameron Shayne.  The creator of Budokon Yoga.  There are about 5 of us staying at his home.. and everyone is great.  Its nice to be in the presence of like minded people.. these people are real... and all come from different backgrounds.. some are martial arts teachers, some are yoga people.. and its great conversation.

At 6pm, Kancho informed us that our first assignment was to take a class at 7:30..wow.. already?  I was STARVING.. luckily we are down the road from the Lincoln Street Mall.. and i got some very yummy pizza...
Then I head to class..
Its WARM in the studio... alright.. it was HOT in the studio.. and I hate hot... here we go!  After 15 minutes of insanely intense Budokon moves.. my ego starts to rear its ugly head... "Why can't my back act like everyone elses back".."why are my arms so damn long making some movements impossibly complicated".. "why won't my breathing settle down.. oh yea.. I have asthma"..
All these thoughts running through my mind as everyone else seemed to move seamlessly through this Budokon flow... as my arms and legs started shaking from the second  I stepped into my first Downward Dog..
The 90 minute class was grueling for my body, my back, my ankle and my breathing.. and as I left to take a shower, I felt defeated.  Like I am over my head here... and yet.. I wont back down.
I got back to Kancho's residence before everyone else and he asked how class was.. and I told him.. my Ego got in the way.. luckily he talked me out of my mood and said he would keep an eye on me tomorrow to help with some modifications that will suit my body better.. which gives me hope.
The Sensei who taught the class kept repeating  a mantra through out class that has opened my eyes a bit.. he said "The way you do Anything, is the way you do Everything.."
Wow.. I have a lot of work to do.

Back to Basics

The body works in weird and mysterious ways.  My last blog mentioned how I so gracefully fell off of a treadmill, by just stepping down. I didn't do anything crazy or radical... just trying to step off of it.  I have spent the last 3 days favoring my right ankle, getting it massaged, iced, elevated and wrapped. It finally started to feel better last night.  This morning, I wake up, to my left knee not cooperating.  What the heck is this?  It wont even bend properly! I don't recall doing anything to it.. I definitely didn't bang it, twist it and I even stopped working out until my ankle was healed.  

So all day long I am hobbling around, limping on the OTHER side now.  Did my left knee feel bad for my right ankle? Or is my body just trying to mess with me less than a week before a MAJOR certification program... Needless to say.. this needs to cease.. and immediately!

Staying Present

I always look forward to Mondays, because I get to teach my teacher training program.  I love sharing knowledge with the students who want to become teachers, and it challenges me the most as well.  Tonights lecture consisted of anatomy, kinetic movement of the body and general statistics of the fitness industry.  One of the key points that I was focusing on this evening was staying present in your body.
Sun Salutation is the most basic warm -up that yoga has to offer.. most of us "yogi's" can do it with our eyes closed.  So thats what I had my trainers to this evening, as an exercise to stay present and to feel the body instead of constantly need to see the body.  It was an eye opening experience for some!  Soon after that we went onto discovering Tree Pose, looking at hip alignment and Eagle Pose, also with hip alignment.
Anatomy and movement are passions of mine. I love looking at how each student moves, and what their natural patterns are, and how we can create new ones.
So after all this talk of staying present, creating new patterns and learning to recognize them in our students, I bid my students good night and head back into the fitness center to say good night and head home.  As I am chatting with my beloved, I take step off the treadmill, and plummet right onto my backside!
My ankle caved under me and I could do nothing else but fall.. right in the middle of the gym.  Luckily it was not busy in there.. however, my ankle is letting me know it is twisted. How Ironic that I am telling my own students to be present when I am not!  Seems like I have a lot of work to do!

Undoing the Holidays

This morning  I was woken up by the phone ringing,( never a good sign), telling me that the facility I was to be teaching at in 2 hours was lacking power, and there was a possibility for class cancellation.  My immediate reaction was a loud *YAWN*, and to get up and make some coffee.  As I walked out of my bedroom, all of the holiday decorations were screaming LOUDLY to me to be taken down and put away.  NO MORE CLUTTER!  I guess this is what happens when you start paying more attention to your immediate surroundings and staying present (day 2 of my new years resolution! so far off to a good start!).

As the was coffee brewing, the cats meowing for food and the phone ringing again stating power was back on.. and therefore so was class.. I raced around the house to get ready. I made my way over to the fitness center.. to be greeted by 37 smiling faces wishing me a Happy New Year.  They were so happy to be taking their first yoga class of 2011 with me.  

Immediately, I was brought back to the reason I embarked on this yoga journey 16 years ago.  I taught, what I thought was a fairly mild class (although i was assured it was a HARD class by many students), and when we got to the best part.. Savasana (meditation), I asked the students to ask them selves this one question: "Why are you here?" What brought you to yoga in the first place.. surely there HAD to be something else better these 37 people can be doing on a dreary Sunday morning, aside from grunting their way through one of my classes.  After class I asked them to share with me what their answer was, if they wanted to.  less than half came up to me to share, but all had the same answer.. to better themselves, to connect to their bodies and find a sense of peace. 

My job as a yoga educator is to assist students in doing just that.. connection to self, breathe and soul. And with each person I come into contact with, just reconfirms why I chose this path in the first place.. 

So if you haven't tried yoga, or haven't really give it a fair shake, come back.. try one more time.. you have nothing to lose and SOO much to gain1